Gosh. I’m just so ready to be done with this place for a while/forever. Ready to start new with a new city, and make something out of my life then what I’m trying to fake it as now. Ready to be somewhere where noone knows me yet.Ready to take what people say at face value and not second guess if they’re feeding me a steaming pile of bullshit, because I hear people’s whispers and looks, and pointing fingers. I’m constantly listening. Even if you think I’m not. I see through your bullshit and give you what you’re dishing out; fake realness. I want to believe what you’re saying is genuine but how can I? The more I listen and hear, and learn you, the more I realize everything. The more I realize I compensate your shitty personality as taking you “with a grain of salt.” No. You’re shit. I just always try and make you the person I remembered once before. And then I find out your intentions. Good as they may seem, it opens my eyes to everyone else. And I second guess the smiles everyone gives me. Second guess everything. Which then doesn’t allow me to fully appreciate the genuine people and their kind words because I’m too busy trying to decide if I want to give the time of day. Yes. New city. New life. New everything.

“I’m dreaming about tomorrow, I’m dreaming of yesterday. I consume myself in sorrow. This moment in time is what I betray. I am searching for the answers..”